Archive for October, 2006

Here I am

Monday, October 30th, 2006 at 1:37 am  
Leave your comment

Take a look at my hands,
Take a look at my heart,
Here I am,
Help me to begin where I am.

WHT@Ipoh was an encouraging weekend for me. I was blessed in many ways, reminded even more of who God is and His love. Somehow that constant stirring is now brewing and releasing a certain fragrant that is making some sense in my life.

Many thanks to the team who I personally saw God in them through various spots and was nice to fellowship once again, like family.

God really encouraged me last weekend by reminding me that He is so much bigger and better than everything else in the world. He is who He is because He simply IS.

I grinded my own heart and mind last night during my drive back up to Penang. Taking a reflective composure and thinking about my life, what more could be given to life?

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for thou art with me. We rest on the thee, our shield and our defender. But God has called me, and I must obey, I need to obey and I want to obey. Rest assured, whatever happens; that’s it in God’s divine plan.

Take a look at my hands,
Take a look at my heart,
Here I am,
Help me to begin where I am.

  • Share/Bookmark

random points

Wednesday, October 25th, 2006 at 4:27 am  
Leave your comment

1. It’s been raining so much up here in Penang that it’s not funny. The silver lining are the clear clouds that appear over the much consistent hazy landscapes once in a while
2. I have seen so many chinese and indian temples in my work environment as I travel that I’m still wondering and trying to find peace with. There’s a stirring with what I’m seeing, some of the temples in the deeper parts of the states, or towns….are rather ‘interesting’
3. The holiday has done me well eventhough I spent much time on the move, but at least I had some good coverage on the things I have been wanting to. Still, I had to be selective and prioritize.
4. I realized that when you ask where the toilet is in the smaller towns, they will ask you small business or big business. Thankfully, it’s always been small for me. The destination for small business is a drain hole and a baldi to wash away. I have learnt to aim and shoot well now.
5. My hokkien is picking up…tampok tampok
6. I swim a lot more than I hit the gym now.
7. I am enjoying the solitude and freedom of minimalism.
8. I am overly excited for a dear friend who just got engaged :)
9. I need to pile up the pounds and size, thankfully for Penang for the assortment of foods – laksa now, i say…laksa!
10. Sitiawan and Pangkor awaits me, then it’s Ipoh for Walk His Trail. The tour is ending soon, I must remind myself to take heart to this production.
11. Green covers with white clouded soft topping is my current view out the window. Trying to word somewhat of that expression, a calming green tea tiramisu with cream? :)

  • Share/Bookmark

Taipingnization

Wednesday, October 18th, 2006 at 7:30 pm  
Leave your comment

Quick one:

Past two days – averaging 11 1/2 hours of work a day. Been working under the hot sun and fierce rains to match. A season that is tiring. Returning to the hotel just to stare at the 4 walls and rest my eyes.

After my time in Kamunting and Bukit Merah, I head off to Kuala Kangsar today. It’s been such an experience and straining upon the healt. Pray for good warm weather throughout. Hot and cold is not an option. Neither is our Christian lives, just makes us get sick huh :)

  • Share/Bookmark

Walking His Trail

Friday, October 13th, 2006 at 12:24 am  
Leave your comment
A brother said to me, “Do you know that you have yet to share your thoughts this season about Walk His Trail?”

It’s been stirring deep within me, this play and impact of the lives of these men. The spirit of God I see in them really amazes me. I have read about them, I have heard about them, I have even heard people that I respect speaks highly of them!

To finally play a role of a missionary, any missionary for that matter when I have yet to even think of missions, I felt somewhat not worthy for the role because I have never actually ‘fully experienced’ the cycle. Yet, I knew, that God was and is still trying to teach me on this current faithful journey.

What are actually my thoughts? Honestly, I can’t place a finger on it. First, I have been so occupied with the current cycle of working life that I haven’t given enough thought about the intensity of the play.

Yet I know, then when I give thought to it, I come to this very passionate thread of plunging myself into the story and at times just dumbfounded by the fact that I’m actually reading a true story and the actual reality that continues to haunt me in a way of prompting uncertain of a true answer.

The uncertainty lies in within me and the truth is the word and faith that God has given me. I struggle, more so, week after week the character and the story becomes more apparent in shaping my life. I believe that God has given us our respective characters for a reason.

He that taketh not up his cross after me, is not worthy of me
He that loveth father or mother more, is not worthy of me
He that findeth his live shall lose, and he that loseth his life for my sake, shall find it

That portion of scripture has been striking the greatest chord in me and I’m somewhat in fear taking the truth to the word. ….loveth father or mother more….is not worthy of me. I wish I had the sure confidence and liberty to speak boldly of it but yet I know, I’m holding back.

My second play, with 10 performances down and Runaway Bride finishing off with 52 performances, still no sign of my parents even the near the premise of any church. I am praying and I’m wondering if they and I have the time to wait anymore…

In me, I know that every step I’m taking now is making a much firmer footprint on the path that I paint for my living existence. Every step is a new mark of trusting and believing. I’m definitely not turning back or reversing anymore. But I think I have yet to press in completely every foot of faith I take. It really takes the will and strength to anchor each step of faith for God. Sometimes, I feel the bigger steps I take for His, the further I am from the most important saving mission for my parents. Selfish? yeah, maybe…but the underlying truth is that my earthly parents are very much of me and I reall yearn to see them come to the Lord.

I cannot imagine sharing life without the Lord that gives us an abundant life.

Walk His Trail for me, has been a step of uncertain markings. As yet, I can’t my destination but I can very well change my direction. To walk His trail isn’t using our mere human sight, but the faith living in us pushing us to go forth!

The potency of the script is unbelievable. One can never really act it out, one must feel and deliver. I am praying that my life will never be only potent when the stage lights are on. Because God has called us to walk in the light and dark, the world is mostly dark. But we, hold the the key to that light. The word and the power of the cross.

We are the candle. And only He can handle.
  • Share/Bookmark

Marina Bay

Tuesday, October 10th, 2006 at 4:23 am  
Leave your comment
I don’t get many chances blogging beside the poolside. So, for once, this is indeed bliss for me. Took a book, enjoyed the weather (clear blue skies, right here in Penang), read a lil’, nap a lil’ and here I am now blogging for a bit more. The wind here is really soothing too, and the scene is very family like with kids playing by the pool while their parents are watching them. I’m just taking in the entire moment and resting my solid mind.

Would probably go for a swim after this and then hit the sauna. Then finish off with some light food and then a gym workout. Of course, there’s dinner and food priority in Penang is always excellent.

And tomorrow…I set off to Taiping for work.
  • Share/Bookmark

Candle

Monday, October 9th, 2006 at 11:57 pm  
Leave your comment
The candle of my life
Has taken a different burn
I have lost my strive
Losing my will to yearn
Is that all I have learnt?
Never try to burn two ends of the candle
Something I knew I could never handle
But I know this is true
Because I am feeling constantly blue
Yet not having a clue
I feel tired, worried and anxious
Very aware and conscious
I battle it all in my mind
It has not been kind
:: the past few months has been a tiring time for me. I feel so exhausted. So detached from the lives of people I care for. I have been worrying about life so often recently, all the what ifs and what nots. Planning for the future and all that stuff….I need to relax.
:::I was encouraged by a passage that I read from Dale Carnegie’s book which says this:-
One day a crowd gathered about him on a hill, and he gave what is probably the most-quoted speech ever delivered anywhere at any time. This speech contains twenty-six words that gone ringing down across the centuries: “Take therefore no thought for the morrow; for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.”
Many men have rejected those words of Jesus and have rejected it as a counsel of perfection, as a bit of mysticism. “I must take thought for the morrow,” they say. “I must take out insurance to protect my family. I must lay aside money for my old age.” Or at least in my age, “I must start saving for a car, house, and a family, I must start investing for my future, time is short. I must plan and get ahead.”
Three hundred years ago the word thought frequently means anxiety. Modern version of the Bible quote Jesus more accurately as saying: “Have no anxiety for the tomorrow.”
By all means take thought for the tomorrow, yes, careful thought and planning and preparation. But have no anxiety.
:::: I have been burning the candle of anxiety. In fact, I have been burning them on both ends. Where is the candle that I once held close to my heart. The candle of faith that has no fear for the morrows, fear of want, fear of failure but a candle that has the power of the cross.
::::: friends, pray for me. that I may light up the idle sticks of my life and burn up for thee.
:::::: I have also realized to live for ‘today’. I have been livinga the yesterdays and wanting to live the future. There is no way I’ll be in any of those seasons, I must understand that today is the only season I have. And that season, is fresh and new every morning. With that, I take hear to light the candle of newlife (today).
What are you burning today?
  • Share/Bookmark